Triumph & tribulation

Last night, Kim & I went for a warmup at the gym, then along our favoured route between the Longwater and Bowthorpe roundabouts (exactly 1.5 miles each way). We successfully managed to run the first leg, and were very pleased. However, my heel was really sore by the end of it, so we walked back again.

Not a bad result: a pace of just under 12 minutes in the running (17'57" for the 1.5 miles), and obviously much slower (28'31") for the walk back. But I'm now concerned at just how sore the heel is feeling. I thought the plantar fasciitis had begun to leave me alone - and after 18 months, it would be about time - but this morning I can barely walk on it, despite painkillers & ice last night. I am still not at all sure whether the orthotics are causing more problems than they are solving; do I need new trainers; should I give in and have a steroid jab...

Will do my best with the Sport Relief Mile - it's only a mile, for heaven's sake! - on Sunday; but am trying very hard not to be depressed right now. No fair.

The first running mile for months

... or nearly a mile, anyway. 0.92 of a mile, from my front door to our first pausing point.

Kim & I went out for a run-walk this morning. Lovely spring day, snowdrops all over the place, sun came out towards the end. Down the usual route to Morton, a brief pause to admire the snowdrops, then on down to the exit from the far end of the estate. Back again, through the woods and home again.

That first leg was all running - and for the most part, according to the Nike+, at a pace that wasn't too far over a ten minute mile and occasionally a bit faster. We then ran and walked alternate bits all the way back to the Rectory, giving us a total mileage (slightly under the Nike+ calculation of 2.86) of 2.72 miles in 34'16". Given that we'd done several stretches of walking, the average pace of just over 12:30 wasn't too bad.

Kim always did bully me out of the frame of mind that said I can't do this. Thankfully. Love her for it.

Now I know that I'll be able to run a mile on Sunday week!

Back to the gym

I haven't had a gym workout since before the play - so about a month. During the "worst of times" - the last 18 months when my running has gone to pot because of injury - I've at least managed to keep visiting the gym; spasmodically, but on average weekly. Once the running is back up to speed - as it were - I'm happiest when I can run 2 or 3 times each week, and get to the gym for machine and weight work just once.

Tonight, with Kim, it was around 45 minutes ' cv on the bike, cross-trainer and stepper, plus about 20 minutes on weights machines. Flexibility of legs awful at the moment, and legs generally very tired (probably because all this week's exercise has been working them), but not a bad session overall.

But I'll be glad when I can look in those ruddy mirrors again without a shudder.

Just a walk

... but as I went to the postbox first (so an extra 0.4 miles in the opposite direction and back), it was at least 2.23 miles and 36 minutes "in oxygen", as they say.

Cold, grey day. Beautiful snowdrops in the woods at Morton.

I got out

Telling myself that I'd just walk my usual 1.75 miles, but as fast as possible, I put on the sports bra under the warm clothes (just in case) and off I went. Very late in the day (nearly 6pm) - I should've gone out two hours earlier - but just made it in the light.

My first reward for going out was a fantastic mackerel sky that I otherwise wouldn't have seen. Of course, the real camera would have done a much better job than the iPhone, but hey.

My second reward was to manage to break into a run, twice, which was (according to the iPhone Nike+ utility - sorry, I'm a geek) a sub-10 minute pace, even if it was only for a couple of minutes. The rest of the walk averaged out at around a 15 minute mile, which was fair enough.

I've committed to running just one mile for Sport Relief in a fortnight's time. I've been too embarrassed to ask for sponsorship so far, and ditto the Race for Life 5K in May, which I've also entered. However, if I can make it down to Morton Hall in one hit in the next thirteen days, never mind back again, then the first one is covered without too much loss of dignity. And then - well, who knows? Back in 2007, I went from zero to a 5K in exactly the same period of time (in fact, less - my first ever run was made on 24th March for a RfL at the same weekend as this one will be). So I can do it again.

Good week

Having managed three gym sessions during this last week - one very brief (only 30 mins, but hey, it's better than nothing) before a rehearsal, and two decent-length workouts with Kim (about 50 mins + stretches in each case), the two of us got out for a run-walk today, together, for the first time in forever.

Genuine reason for only running (and that very slowly) part of the route was that all the recent snow / sleet / hail have left the roads, in places, treacherous, and turning ankle during get-back-to-running time didn't seem wise; but coming up through the woods at Morton Hall, rather than up the drive, the sheltered and leaf-covered paths were actually much easier to run on - no ice! Yes, tough going and wobbly legs; yes, we probably only ran about three-quarters of a mile out of the total of just under 2 miles; but good. Very good. No idea how long it took; was more interested in getting it done than timing it. Having bought a new sensor for the Nike+ kit I'll start monitoring it again soon.

I made our entries for the 2010 Race for Life this week, and was rather deflated when looking for a running photo of myself for the sponsorship page: depressing to see how different I look now. However, I've done it before so I can do it again.

NB: left heel (plantar fasciitis) hurts like the devil right now, but it didn't while we were running. That job went to the under-used thighs and calves.

Hang on in there with me.

peeking over the parapet

I had a real hissy fit the other day.

As you can see, if you're really interested, from earlier entries, my fitness journey went in waves. Having spent around 44 years messing around with dieting but little exercise, in January 2007 I finally cracked it, and got a PT; six weeks later, I started running; and for eighteen months, life was good. A couple of minor injuries were overcome, I always got back in the swing of things, and the lost 20lb or so stayed off.

Plantar fasciitis kicked in during the autumn of 2008, and wrecked everything. And yes, I guess I let it. But it hurt. Lots. And that feeling of freedom, of running without ouch-ouch-ouch, which I found just occasionally, was lost. And I panicked. And the weight went back on. And so on, and so on.

Let's be fair to self: the weight didn't quite all go back on - it was all bar about 4lb. Given that in any previous existence I'd have leapfrogged over my previous heaviest weight, I guess I can put this down to the fact that I've at least managed one gym session per week, on average, during that fifteen months or so since I was running regularly. I've managed to stay within a size 14, rather than giving in to the sixteens again - but oh, the twelves were so much better.

So the hissy fit? Well, I'm in a play right now - rehearsing for a production of Come Back to the 5 & Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean at the Sewell Barn Theatre in Norwich, last two weeks in February. My character is Sissy - who, if you've ever seen the 1970s film, was the part played by Cher. I don't have her waistline, hair, eyes or money, but I sure as hell have the tits - and always will do, no matter what my weight.

Well, we had publicity photos taken the other night. I need a wig (my own hair is much too short for the period) and the only one they could source for the occasion looked awful - more width on my face I really do not need. And when I saw myself next to the actresses playing Mona (dainty, petite) and the younger versions of Mona & Sissy (gorgeous teenagers) on the screen on the back of the digital camera, my heart sank. Elephantine was not the word. Well, it was, actually.

I got home, and found an comment awaiting moderation: from the lovely gymbunny21, asking ever so nicely where my updates were, and saying how much she'd enjoyed this blog in the past. She's lost two stone - good on you, girl. She's just started her blog, and is newly motivated. Had I kept my weight off, was I still running?

Well, I just sat down and howled. I'd been ignoring the blog, ignoring the scales, and trying not to remember how good it used to make me feel, because I felt so ashamed. And here was a complete stranger caring what had happened to me.

So here we are again. I tried to run back in April last year - and gave up after a couple of tries; and again in August - ditto. Now the Race for Life 5K beckons once more. The heel might hurt still, but when I said to my darling friend and erstwhile PT, Kim, "I can walk for about half an hour before it starts to hurt" she wisely pointed out that if I could walk, then I could run for that time, too. The resting hasn't helped it, as far as I can tell, so I may as well put up with the discomfort.

And if I can get back to one or two runs plus one or two gym sessions per week, I know that those twenty pounds will be behind me. (No, I don't mean on my arse.)

I have just turned 47. I don't want to get any nearer fifty with the same image problems as I've had virtually all my life. So... here we go again.

I have just got back from a walk-run. My old, favourite route, down to Morton Hall: 1.75 miles round trip, flat-ish (this is Norfolk, after all) but a few undulating bits that make it slightly harder work on the way back. 200 steps walking and 200 running on the way there; the same on the way back but alternating every 100 steps. CV: not too bad. Leg muscles: despite gym sessions, clearly wondering what the heck I'm up to. Heel: not actually painful, but clearly something is still out of kilter. Not sure how much of that is psychological. Don't know how long it took me, I forgot to time it, but I think it was around about 22 minutes - so at least a bit faster than a straight walk would have been.

Weight: 11 stone 10 lb. Weeks till RfL: just over 15.

Thank you, Kim. Thank you, husband. And thank you, gymbunny, for the kick up the substantial arse that I needed.